I used to be a control freak??!! Incredibly organized. Everything had its place and everything in its place. Then what would happen if something was out of place? It would freak me out??!!! I would go out of place. Upset by things I couldn’t control which left me frustrated, angry and then as a result of using so much energy….. exhausted.
Back then I didn’t know there was another way. That I was in control of my circumstances. I had a choice. I could let life control me or I could control my life. I could choose my thoughts and emotions to uplift me rather then deplete me.
I became aware today of how much I have changed and grown. Today I made a decision to control my thoughts and emotions. This awareness came as I made a mistake. I arrived at the airport today to fly up to Sydney at 12 midday only to find there was no record of my booking. I observed my reaction throughout. I did not react and kept thinking it will work out.
I approached the Qantas staff and a lovely lady checked my booking for me. My booking reference revealed that I booked my flight for the following day at 12 midday. I laughed and said, “oh well my mistake!” She instructed me to go up to the booking counter to have it changed.
As I waited in line I noted my behaviour. I wasn’t reacting as I usually would. I wasn’t frustrated or angry. I thought there is always a solution. For some reason I wasn’t meant to be on that flight and there will be others.
The change of flight did cost more than my initial booking but I thought, “oh well it's only money”. Actually this whole experience has been priceless. To realize how much I have grown and now choose to be kind to myself instead of hard on myself has been worth its weight in gold! I have been working on myself diligently to choose the easy way rather than the hard road in life and today I realized the neuropathways in my brain are now wired. It is my new normal to be kind to myself rather than a control freak and able to lovingly control my circumstances.
Be kind to yourself today and choose the easy road, walk down a new street!